Of clocks and cakes

Veteran  Australian games writer, David Wildgoose has told staff writers under his tutelage that games are not clocks. Presumably because:

a) Not all games employ the same systems and work the same way
b) "There's more to games than just how well they operate" (Henderson, 2011; p36)
c) When reviewing games, you shouldn't be checking features against a checklist 

Brendan Keogh - another prolific writer of Australian stock - recently tweeted the analogy that games are not like cakes. He said (and I am paraphrasing somewhat) he's more interested in how the cake makes you feel (how it tastes), as opposed to the quality of the ingredients.

Hybrid Theory

I agree with both theories to an extent, but my recent experience with Assassin's Creed: Liberation would have me ask Ubisoft Sofia and Montreal where they source some of their ingredients. Don't get me wrong, I like the game, but there are two elements of it that are driving me to madness. 

Firstly there's the control scheme, which needlessly shoehorns in some loathsome, Vita-specific input (read: touch controls) that have marred a game that I'd otherwise recommend without question. Firstly, there's pick-pocketing: an action that's effortlessly performed in the home console iterations by holding the X/A button around the citizenry of Renaissance Italy. In Liberation, you need to hold down the left shoulder and swipe down the rear touchpad. Doesn't sound like it involves too much effort, but when you've been playing a game a certain way for a matter of years, the change is unwelcome. Worse still, the implementation of gyroscopic controls for a specific puzzle sequence nearly had me hurling the expensive portable against the wall. Both these scenarios comprise a small part of the Liberation experience, but they've done enough to taint my opinion of it thus far. 

The visuals and soundtrack combine to make one dreary looking layer of sponge cake: like someone added blue and green food colouring to the mix to make grey batter. It's not that the game doesn't look good, rather the omnipresent brown of the ground and structures in New Orleans (where you'll spend the majority of your time) combined with a Creole spin on the Nolan Batman score had me wallowing in the pits of despair. Regardless of whether Aveline adopts her vibrant lady persona, assassin garb, or slave costume, you're treated to the same rotation of tracks that evoke little but dread and thoughts of violence. I'm not so naive or insensitive to think a rousing, light-hearted track would be appropriate fodder for our hero to sneak through a plantation, but surely high society has more pleasant notes to offer? 

In any case, Assassin's Creed: Liberation is shaping up to be one of the better games on the fledgling handheld; at the very least, it's proving more enjoyable than Revelations. I can only hope that there's less improvised motion and touch controls thrown into what's left of the game. 

References:

Wildgoose, D (Editor), 2011. Hyper, Special Japan Issue, p65. 

Assassin's Creed: Revelations Review (PS3 - single player campaign): Define "revelation"

It's silly, you know. I decide that I'm going to refrain from buying games for -- what is ostensibly -- the rest of the year, so the first thing I do is finish off the most recent instalment in a series renowned for historical intrigue. The last thing this addict needs is a cliffhanger, and luckily enough, Assassin's Creed: Revelations fails to live to up to its name. There's nothing akin to a revelation to be found within this unnecessary chapter that follows the exploits of two familiar master assassins, Altair and Ezio Auditore and their descendant, Desmond Miles.

There was one burning question that I had at the end of Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood. If there was one thing I expected from Revelations, it was some kind of resolution to that. Follow-up of any kind to the final moments of the last instalment was all I wanted. After roughly ten to fifteen hours of awkward stabbery, I have no further clues as to why things went to shit at the end of Brotherhood. The only thing, story-wise, that I got from this game can be discovered simply by watching a trailer for Assassin's Creed III.  That's right, the Revelation is that the Assassin's Creed series is going stateside: GET HYPE!!!

While Assassin's Creed: Revelations doesn't live up to the lofty standards I've set for the series, it is, at the very least, a substantial offering that has several redeeming features. Best of all is the brand new setting of Constantinople, another location teeming with life and packed with imposing structures. The new hookblade -- while not a gamechanger -- does allow for a noticeable increase in climbing speed, making stunning ascents all the more enjoyable. The search for the Masayaf Keys also presents some of the greatest platforming sequences in the series' history, with stunning visuals, feverish pace, and a minimum of fuss (read: combat). There also some likeable characters thrown into the mix: Suleiman, Yusuf and Sofia Sartor prove to be just as compelling as the members of Ezio's Brotherhood from the last two instalments. I did, however, feel that the Altair memories were entirely pointless and the characters contained within added nothing of substance to the series' lore. It is entirely possible that anyone could enjoy this game, but I've seen the best that this series has achieved, and I couldn't suffer much of it without screaming at the screen (or twisting the control til I felt it could break, or my eyes rolling to the back of my head).

Burn your papers, they ain't worth reading.

As for what's wrong with the game, short version: it just feels somewhat unpolished. As per my previous post, new mechanics like bomb-making and tower defense felt best when avoided completely. Unnecessary additions from previous instalments like managing the assassin war, the real estate metagame and the Templar towers that hold it back, all return to provide an artificial length to proceedings. Want to afford that new piece of armour? That's fine, you'll just need to retreat to higher ground, spot the Templar captain with Eagle Sense, kill them, ignite the relevant Templar tower, buy some businesses, wait twenty to forty minutes until monies are deposited in the bank, and withdraw money from the bank... unless you don't own a bank; then you'll need to buy a bank. There's also some woefully-designed missions that revolve around the series' busted stealth mechanics which irked me to no end. Assassin's Creed: Revelations features everything I dislike about the series.

Worst of all, the disjointed combat system from the previous instalment returns with the addition of enemies that can't be damaged by anything but counter hits. While these enemies don't appear until closer to the end of the game, what it means is that combat slows to a crawl. All of those mechanics introduced in Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood that had the intent of getting Ezio on the offensive are undone. For the last three hours of the campaign, I actively avoided combat. When I wasn't required to rout the enemy, I got the fuck away from anything with a weapon, let alone a mask. For someone who used to grab a horse and ride towards enemy encampments outside of Acre just to pick a fight in the first game, the slow, frustrating flavour of Revelations' combat stings. If you're thinking of jumping into the series, don't start here. 

Counter that shit.

Assassin's Creed: Revelations isn't a bad game, it's just not a particularly good one. There are some fantastic missions and sequences on offer in this instalment, but these great moments were often bracketed by frustrating and unnecessary gameplay. The title of this instalment is also terribly misleading. I just wanted an answer to one burning question, and all I got was interesting though ultimately pointless exposition.

The Last Supper

As expected, things got a little hectic in the lead-up to the great fast. I kept my eyes glued to the Daily Deals, Flash Sales and Community Choice promotions -- which in a disappointing twist, were merely daily deals reconstituted for the slow to decide -- and came up with my smallest tally in my history of dealing (yes, dealing) with Steam sales. Just over a hundred dollars spent and over twenty games acquired:

• Quantum Conundrum (with Season Pass)
• Driver: San Francisco
• E.Y.E: Divine Cybermancy
• Krater
• Tiny and Big: Grandpa's Leftovers
• Dungeon Siege I, II and III
• The Walking Dead
• Dead Rising 2: Off the Record
• Dear Esther
• Total War: Shogun 2 (and Fall of the Samurai)
• Gotham City Impostors
• Trine 2
• PixelJunk Eden
• Legend of Grimrock
• Ys: The Oath in Felghana
• aaaaand a bunch of games I own on other platforms but don't have the self-control to refuse at ridiculous prices: Burnout Paradise, F3AR, Crysis 2, Red Faction: Armageddon, Batman: Arkham Asylum and Arkham City

I wasn't -- for the lack of a better word -- strong enough to let it end there though. I also picked up the following console games to see me through this trial:

• Theatrythm: Final Fantasy
• Spec Ops: The Line
• The Darkness II 
• Tony Hawk Pro Skater HD
• Virtua Fighter 5: Final Showdown

Honestly,  if I can't survive just over 4 months on this final meal, it's over. I know I have a problem, but cataloguing a week's worth of this shit has been somewhat of a wake-up call. On the bright side, I did manage to knock one game off the pile of shame already: Assassin's Creed: Revelations (review forthcoming).

Wish me luck!

 Hang in there, peeps: a review will be up soon.

Edit: The website I ordered Spec Ops: The Line and The Darkness II through couldn't process payment on Monday (23 July), so I decided to cancel. Didn't want to disqualify myself before I even started!

Sum of parts divided by fun = Assassin's Creed: Revelations

Assassin's Creed: Revelations is a baffling game. I should love it, but every time I start to enjoy myself, frustration interjects. I don't think it's because the developers were against players having fun, rather they didn't have the time to create a game that met the series' usually high standard.

Whether it's the new mechanics, like bomb-making and den (read: tower) defense, or the combat and general parkour that characterise the series, you get the feeling that someone was standing behind the various creative teams with whip in hand. Brotherhood's annoying combo kill system returns and the rhythm of melee encounters is more stilted than ever before. I've mistakenly plunged to my death while traversing across Constantinople more times than I'd care to admit, and the new hookblade and zip lines don't really do much to counter the feeling of déja vu Revelations presents to series' veterans. I've only ever used bombs or thought of making them when the mission design thrusts it into the realm of necessity. As for the den defense, it is, simply put, a crime against gaming.

 I would sooner stick this bomb up my ass, than defend another den!

I don't abhor tower defense games in the slightest. Pixeljunk Monsters and Fieldrunners are just some examples of the genre done right. Revelations' effort is so horrendously unbalanced that I've opted to just let my territory fall to the Templars and reclaim it the old-fashioned (read: more enjoyable, but still unnecessary) way: by killing Templar captains and igniting the base they just took from me. After the tutorial, I have failed to succeed in these sequences; even when I've taken the advice of friends and built numerous barricades and covered rooftops with gunmen. I can't make heads or tails of it, even when my experience with it hasn't required me to cover multiple routes: your enemies have only one route to your den. Throw me a bone!

The story isn't overly compelling either; the only thing driving me forward is a desire to see some loose ends tied up (and there's no guarantee of that happening in this instalment!). I just wish the whole Animus Island thing was done away with. The only thing it's presented so far is some cryptic conversation and the most nauseating first person puzzle sequence that I've ever played through. Thankfully, the majority of the game takes place in the Animus-rendered past, but even Ezio's charms fail to drag the narrative out of mediocrity's territory. Sure, the opportunity to once again walk in Altair's boots is appreciated, but I can't think of a single thing in this game that hasn't been done better in its predecessors. 

Maybe I'm being too hard on this game? Maybe the best is yet to come? I feel I'm about halfway through, and apart from a breathtaking sequence underneath Galata Tower, I couldn't recommend Assassin's Creed: Revelations to anyone but the most ardent of fans.

Has anyone else played through Assassin's Creed: Revelations? What are your thoughts on it?

That is a Bulls#!t Call, Ref!

In the time I've contributed to this blog, I've waffled on about all sorts of crap. Sometimes I even reviewed games (shock horror). Maybe nowhere near as many as Dutch has, but there were a couple.

When I did these reviews, I like to think they were not biased in any way, shape or form. Sure, I only reviewed games I liked, but that's because I'm stingy on buying games and time poor with playing them.

I recently opened my local rag to see what this week's rants were all about when I noticed a newish column about gaming. It was a review of Assassins Creed Revelations. His verdict: a ridiculous 10/10.

At first, I thought that just because I have no interest in the game doesn't mean that it's crap, and therefore not worthy of a perfect score. Upon further investigation, however, metacritic gave it 80%. At best it was awarded 9/10 from an individual site.

Thats a big difference between the aggregated and the delivered scores. While I'm sure that it's got decent graphics and a story that ties into the others in the series (and yes, personal opinions will provide a range of scores), I just can't help but be annoyed at this perfect score.

If professional critics can find flaws, surely a fan can; surely a random player of games can. In my books, a game has to be pretty awesome on all levels to get that perfect score; not just be enjoyable and fit the theme of the rest of the series.

Dutch has touched on this topic before, but I suppose it's never really hit a nerve until now. I'm not even sure why it's bothering me.

What are your thoughts on games being inaccurately reviewed? Have you ever bought a game based on said review to find it was crap and the reviewer was clearly bias towards the franchise/publisher? Am I just as bad for not accepting the review due to my own bias towards the game?