Previously I’ve bagged mobile phone gaming, questioning its validity and relevance especially when compared to console or PC games. With an impending work conference to attended (with guaranteed downtime) as well as a two year old who knows how to open my iPhone and find the games, I thought it was time to give it a crack and find some bargains.
While Dutch was busy scouring the Steam Summer Sale, I happened to come across the Activistion sale on iTunes. Nowhere near as exciting but still satisfying, Activision classics such as Guitar Hero and Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater 2 were half price.
Anyway, like I said, it was nowhere near as exciting as the Steam sale but since THPS 4 was the first game I ever bought for my PS2, the series holds a special place in my heart (especially the numbered games because the Wasteland/Bam games were crap).
The mobile version is true to the original in terms of graphics and game play, with the only difference being the way the game feels. I’m still getting used to the grind/flip/ollie/grab buttons on the touch screen but I’m sure I’ll get the hang of it soon.
With years of experience on the console, the touch screen is still quite foreign. I’m finding the fact that I can’t physically feel the buttons under my thumbs distracting and I feel lost when holding the phone. Have you felt the same?
To help my daughter have a little more fun, I picked up Halfbrick’s Fruit Ninja. Whilst this isn’t the newest of releases, it’s a game that’s fun to play. Essentially you need to slice up fruit as it launches from the bottom of the screen, using your finger as a knife. Based on the simplicity, my daughter is ableto understand it, but keeps missing fruit and cutting her game time short.
Thankfully there is a timed practice area that we can play in so that she can miss as many pieces of fruit as she likes without cutting her time short. Best of all, not only does it entertain her, but me too.
Something I’ve found a little more addictive is Fragger. You can pick this up for free and the aim is to throw grenades at the enemy and blow up them up. It’s essentially Worms without the cuteness or ability to move, with the cartoon graphics providing an inexplicable appeal.
Further searching for time fillers pointed me in the direction of Street Fighter IV. Had I picked this up last month, I would’ve only paid $1.99, however I was a bit slow and grabbed it at the full price of $5.99. I’m yet to play it but I can assure you it will get a good run in on Sunday.
Have you bought any games for your phone that you can’t get enough of?
It's that time of the year again. Another financial year has come to an end, and gamers are left to ponder what has been a heavily-populated release calendar. For my part, I'm happy to advise you of what I believe to be the best five games I've played so far this year. As with last year's strenuous auditing, it's important that you're aware of the following limitations:
I'm one man, so I can only play and afford so many games. That being said, I've spent a ridiculous amount of money and time on games so far this year; so there's a lot of titles up for consideration.
Given the afformentioned time constraints, please be aware that I have not spent an adequate amount of time - if any at all - with the following big releases: L.A Noire, Red Faction: Armageddon, F.3.A.R (which I am absolutely loving despite its rough appearance), Mortal Kombat, The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time 3D, Shadows of the Damned and Portal 2.
I will only comment on games that I have completed, or come very close to completing.
Only games released between 1 January 2011 and 30 June 2011 will be discussed
With those conditions in mind, allow me to reflect on the best that 2011 has had to offer.
5. Stacking (PSN/XBLA - Played on Playstation 3)
I still haven't been able to reconcile whether I liked Stacking solely on the basis of its whimsical design or if the non-existent purchase price - on account of being a Playstation Plus member - had something to with it. Regardless, Charlie Blackmore's quest to reunite his loveable family of chimney-sweeping Russian dolls was an absolute delight to play through. Navigating through each of the villainous Baron's domains - each dripping with silent movie era charm - players must possess larger characters and utilize their unique abilities to solve rarely-taxing puzzles. There's something about solving a conundrum with vomit that is not only memorable, but satisfying (in some twisted way) as well. There were puzzles that did not involve bodily functions as well, but most are resolved through simplistic, logical actions. The game may have been short and meticulously-directed, but as a result no part of the experience felt unnecessary. I'll remember Stacking most favourably for its high quality presentation. The visuals, a mix of art deco, almost steampunk design and a piano-centric, fanciful score. Short, expensive, but well worth a download.
4. Crysis 2 (PS3/360/PC - Played on PS3)
Start spreading the news: Crysis 2 is well worth your time. The narrative may not have meant anything to anyone but series' veterans, but seriously, why would you care when you can cloak? Story doesn't really matter that much to me either when you jump around the ruins of New York City as a super-powered agent of forces you won't fully understand; at least not with the explanation the game gives you anyway. The absence of an engaging tale also failed to concern me when I could combat foes of impressive size and design. The different varieties of Ceph ensure that players will need to employ different tactics for each combat situation if they want to progress; you may be able to dispatch a group of grunts without acknowledging your surroundings, but good luck to the brave (read: stupid) man who engages a pinger in an open battlefield. Crysis 2 affords players the tools and ability to make the most of their surroundings. You can even use giant metallic donuts to combat your foes: everything is a weapon. The game also features several sequences of destruction that should be seen by any FPS enthusiast; landmarks torn asunder by an alien threat in consistently-spectacular fashion. Not to say that CELL operatives - your human opponents - can't offer up a spectacular explosion. What better way to end a fight against a helicopter gunship then to have it plunge into the building you're firing from? Crysis 2 also features the most memorable score in recent memory and a solid multiplayer offering that is a valid alternative for those tiring of the Call of Duty formula. A fantastic package to be sure!
3. Mass Effect 2 (PS3)
Writing this list has been - to an extent - an exercise in eating my own words. Nowhere has this statement been more true than with my second attempt at playing through Mass Effect 2. As some would be aware, I didn't exactly take to Bioware's space opera sequel the first time around on the Xbox 360. I even gave it the closest thing to a lambasting that I've seen anyone give Mass Effect 2; critics couldn't speak highly enough of Shepard's second adventure and I could not understand why. This time around however, everything seemed better; if not more bearable. I also employed a different class and approached the game's missions in a slightly different sequence to that from my first attempt. The first six hours still dragged and the vehicle segments were still more awkward than a lunch date with an ex, but persistence paid off. After a very slow, almost painstaking start to proceedings, players are treated to an expansive world full of rich, (usually) well-developed characters. The are some - *cough* Jack *cough* - that are still quite grating and Zaeed and Kasumi feel like superficial additions at best, but you'll care about the rest of the crew of the Normandy; that much I can guarantee. The combat can feel a little awkward, but some of the biotic powers are awesome to behold; particularly when they reach their full potential. Not many games feature firefights with enemies literally floating in mid air as you and your comrades pepper the surrounds with bullets and explosive fire. Further to that, few other titles offer the potential for so many central characters to die in the final act; without careful consideration, you can have a real bloodbath on your hands. There is a real sense of weight and consequence to the choices that you make in Mass Effect 2. The consequences of specific actions and dialogue options may seem a little obvious - even ham fisted - but the choices are still there to be made.If you haven't done so after releases on multiple platforms across two years, do yourself a favour and experience this brilliant sci-fi RPG.
Throw in some spaceships and you've got Mass Effect 2 right here!
2. inFamous 2 (PS3) inFamous 2 may be the year so far's best game, but it comes in the second best package. The Hero Edition did include a cool messenger bag (which I actually use), a statue and a mini-comic - and let's not forget about the woefully-implemented exclusive DLC - but it didn't include a ticket to the beta trial of what will be one of the best competitive multiplayer experiences of the year. I know you get access to the Uncharted 3: Drake's Deception beta with purchase of this title, and it may surprise and offer an experience on par with Epic's powerhouse; but I doubt it will. I'll be in it for the campaign more than anything else, I suspect. Back to the issue at hand, inFamous 2 offers the most prolific boss fights in sandbox action game history whether they have you hanging from a helicopter, shooting from a trailer or on foot and up close and personal with your usually-monstorus opponets. The scale of some of the enemies you will encounter is unmatched: monsters that are taller than apartment complexes and office towers, their attacks fearsome without feeling cheap. On top of some brilliant "Man Vs Godzilla," moments, inFamous 2 also benefits from improved mission design, some new powers that make movement more fluid and -to be frank - joyous, and fan service for those who played the first game. There may have been some narrative missteps and some weak characterisation, but ultimately inFamous 2 is a game that you need to play.
1. Bulletstorm: Epic Edition (X360/PS3/PC - Played on Xbox 360)
Now before anyone starts quoting my review for inFamous 2 (what? it could happen), you need to consider what the Bulletstorm: Epic Edition package offered in its entirety. Not only did you get a quality, foul-mouthed first person shooterin Bulletstorm, you also got access to the Gears of War 3 Beta before anyone else (and for longer than anyone else I might add). On its own merits, Bulletstorm is an insanely-enjoyable game, with gunplay revolving around skillshots that ranged from the relatively-mundane "Headshot", all the way through to the ridiculous "Fireworks" which tasks players with hitting suspended enemies - thown into the air with a charged thumper - with a charged flare gun shot. On top of the skillshot metagame, there were also several memorable set pieces and boss fights for players to make their way through with the help of some creative weaponry, alternate fire modes and spins on genre staples: such as the sniper rifle which allowed players to plot the course of bullets and even detonate them if the shot was charged. All of this chaos was articulated in a single campaign of respectable length which was skillfully paced; never mind that the narrative never really went anywhere meaningful. While it didn't offer much in the way of replay value, Bulletstorm was easily one of the most enjoyable, funny and visually-impressive titles released in 2011.
As for the Gears of War 3 Beta, it offered enough ammunition for multiple posts and more play time than most full releases that I've played this year. The promise of some cosmetic unlockables and a preview of the new combat mechanics had me hooked. Sure there may be some balance issues, but this substantial trial is sure to make the time between now and the intended release in September drag on for what will seem like forever and a day.
Cosmetic unlockables: Is there anything more glorious?
There are two times in a calendar year that I've come to fear. Times when reason is discarded on the promise of unbeatable prices, on all but the most recent of releases. I'm talking of course about Steam's two major sales: one in summer, one for the Holiday season, both causing unspeakable damage to the budgets and resolves of all but the most frugal of gamers. Now these sales are particularly painful for me because I am undisciplined and anything but frugal. People talk about their "pile of shame," but most can rest easy in the knowledge that their towers will be eclipsed by my quarry of unplayed videogames. I wish I could say that it was just digital acquisitions, but my desire to consume has led to a tangible and intangible mass of gaming gluttony. A mass that is only set to grow in size after some of the unbelievable offers that I’ve seen in the first few days of the Summer Camp bonanza.
Beware of adorable marketing material!
Some of the offers seem too good to be true. Most would lead many (myself included) to question their preference for console gaming. Sure, the initial investment required to purchase a capable machine would be greater than the purchase price of a console; but at this crazy time of year, games can be three or so times cheaper than the console equivalent. Take yesterday's ridiculous Battlefield Pack as an example: $9.99 USD for one of last year's best shooters, Battlefield: Bad Company 2 and all available DLC. Compare that to the best price for a console version which is $29.95 AUD for the game, plus another $19.95 AUD for the Battlefield: Vietnam expansion (on PSN) and another $20 plus for the Onslaught and Spec Act packs. Now I own the game and all DLC on the Playstation 3 and I seriously considered buying it on PC. I wish I could explain the logic behind this impulsive purchase decision, but it took all of my self-control to remove the pack from my cart.
Best. Value. EVER!
Let's not forget about the publisher packs either. Some of these deals are so amazing that you had best bring some smelling salts or - at the very least - ensure that you are seated whilst perusing the Steam Store. The THQ Hit Collection is causing me the most headaches. Dawn of War II and each of its expansions (including the recently-released Retribution), the self-maligned Homefront, Darksiders, Red Faction: Guerilla and more for less than the recommended retail price of a Platinum game for the Playstation 3. To someone who has spent most of their time buying for and playing games on consoles, such a proposition is baffling, though irrevocably beautiful at the same time. What have I done to deserve such unbelievable prices, holy Steam?
I'm not just buying console ports either. The Summer sale will allow me to indulge in some smaller scale releases that I wouldn't normally purchase. Garshasp: The Monster Slayer and the Magicka Complete Pack will be my first indie acquisitions, but I'm also looking at picking up Jamestown and Terraria before this circus of value comes to a close.
Events like this will only serve to secure Steam's monopoly of the digital market. EA recently announced their "Biggest Sale Ever," via their Origin service (sale items also feature on the iOS App Store and Xbox Live Marketplace) which is not only exclusive to customers based in the US but also fails to offer anything anywhere near as enticing as Steam's near-fortnight of peerless savings. There are rare challenges to Steam’s ability to offer value for money. Recent examples include Good Old Games’ (gog.com) offer of extra store credit to Australian consumers who purchased The Witcher 2: Assassins of Kings at the inflated Australian region price and perhaps also, their Interplay “Staycation,” which allowed gamers to pick up the first two installments of the Fallout franchise in addition to turn-based RPG spin-off, Fallout Tactics for just under three US dollars each. GamersGate are worth a look as well, for sure; but ultimately, nothing beats a good Steaming.
Have you been indulging in the sale? Do you cherish these times of the year, or, have you come to fear them like myself?
The launch of the Virtual Console, and some intriguing recent releases have led to me falling deeply in love with my 3DS. I've had the console since day one, but it's only now that I've found myself booting it up on a daily basis. Dead or Alive: Dimensions was another toast to the fighting genre's improved health. Super Street Fighter IV: 3D Edition may have been available since launch, but I only really got around to playing it last month; it was awesome, best online fighting experience available on any platform. The afformentioned Virtual Console has allowed for me to engage with titles that I wanted to play in my youth (and since my youth; starting to get a bit impatient after today's update however. One game only). Last week also saw the release of the critically-lauded The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time, re-imagined in three dimensions (forgive me for waxing lyrical; truth be told I didn't really care for it when I first played it on the Nintendo 64). It finally feels as though Nintendo's new portable is hitting its stride.
Three weeks into the new eCommerce channel's life and I've got some recommendations for you. Not many, but enough to justify a post all the same.
Super Mario Land - $6 AU
This is not your typical Mario title. Sure, there's plenty of platforming and fire flowers to please series faithful, but everyone's favourite plumber is packing some lead in his overalls. By that of course, I mean that Mario falls heavy and fast from any height; unlike more recent iterations where you feel as though you have a little more control over your descent. Side-scrolling vehicular shooting also serves to break up the action and is functional, even enjoyable. Interestingly enough (Spoiler Alert), the final boss fight follows this format and is a genuine challenge. Enemies and level design are varied, but start to get cheap towards the end. Cheap to the point where the console's Restore Point feature was required for me to finish the game. With the use of the Restore Point, I was able to finish the game in an hour. That being said however, there's a Hard difficulty unlocked upon finishing the game and you could happily spend hours trying to beat the game using naught but your own abilities.
How all great adventures start.
The Verdict
If you feel any love for classic platforming and don't mind some side-scrolling shooting, Super Mario Land is well worth the price of admission. By no means is this Mario's greatest adventure, but it has aged pretty well all things considered.
Double Dragon - $4.50 AU
I've played Double Dragon on many different platforms. The Sega Master System and Arcade version were somewhat similar, but this Game Boy version is a completely different monster. It is cheap beyond belief; rigid platforming and powerful boss characters would have elicited streams of tears if I was playing this on the 3DS' AA battery-powered predecessor. Once again, thanks to the Restore Point feature of the portable console's emulator, I can defeat the burliest of adversaries. I can cheat death. I can rewind time, and chip away Double Dragon's once impenetrable challenges. Cheap death after cheap death, I kept playing; drunk with power. Without the ability to save I was still able to make it half way through the third "mission," though. I relished the challenge until my curiosity got the better of me and I saw the treachery that appeared past my best effort. Unlike Super Mario Land, this is not a game that can be conquered without the use of assistance.
Save me, Restore Point! Lord knows I can't save myself.
The Verdict
Great, cheap - in respect to both price and design - fun. The soundtrack and classic beat 'em-up action will serve a good hour or two of fun to be sure. I love it, but if you're not a fan of failure or unfair level design: you'd best leave this alone. That should be the end of my 3DS coverage for the time being. I've just started playing F.3.A.R or Fthreear depending on your level of beligerence. The visuals aren't too special, but the visceral gunplay coupled with the added ability to take cover is proving to be very enjoyable. That, and Contractions is Zombies mode (from Call of Duty: World at War/Black Ops) done right.
The original Lego Star Wars was somewhat of a revelation. Combining beat 'em up gameplay with simplistic puzzles and a unique brand of speechless humour, it managed to rise above the assertions usually made against licensed games. In that respect, it was amazing because it had to emerge from the shadows of two prominent licenses; Star Wars games had a reasonable strike rate, but Lego games would drift towards awful more often than not. Like any popular premise however, its spread was of pandemic proportion: Indiana Jones, Harry Potter, Pirates of the Caribbean, even Batman got the Lego treatment. That and sequels on multiple platforms all but ensured that the Lego "Insert popular intellectual property here," formula would begin to grate on me and by extension (I assume; ha!), most gamers. Lego Star Wars III: The Clone Wars marks the first time that I've engaged with the brick building phenomenon since the listless Lego Indiana Jones. It also marks the first time that I've played an instalment of the series on a portable. With all that in mind, read on to see whether the Lego games have evolved or continued their slow, defiantly-successful demise.
The Good
Consistently charming - After all these years, shtick like a clone trooper panic-firing into the approaching mist while doing push-ups manages to elicit a laugh. A genuine laugh too. Few other titles - let alone entire series - have a signature charm and sense of humor that consistently deliver. I'll put it this way: General Grievous killing a jedi was almost made to look cute in one of the many short, humorous cut scenes.
Solid - While not the most exciting game I've ever played, Lego Star Wars III offers plenty of play time to young, budding Star Wars fans and those of us who still aren't too keen on growing up. The main campaign will take a good eight hours to conquer, but then you've got Free Play, True Jedi challenges and hundreds of unlockables to keep you occupied. My time with Lego Star Wars III was bereft of any bugs, crashes and any other noticable glitches (save for some minor clipping issues). Considering that in the last month I've been playing games like Fallout: New Vegas where you can literally disappear into the earth you're treading on; once I even clipped into the side of a mountain and took continuous fall damage, there's no denying that you're playing a well-constructed package, that's for sure.
Lando - For those (like myself) who have little love for the prequel trilogy or the kid-friendly show that is the primary source material for this iteration of the Lego Star Wars franchise, Traveller's Tales Fusion have thankfully included many original trilogy favourites as unlockable characters. Chewie, Lando, and even the Trandoshan bounty hunter, Bossk are available at the expense of a princely amount of studs. That being said, if you do have a penchant for the more recent addition to the series' lore there's an extensive cast of characters available for use if you're ready to invest the time.
Door, meet lightsaber - ThePhantom Menace did a great deal of damage to me, as it did most Star Wars fans. There was almost nothing redeemable to be found in the entire film, save for the creative application of a lightsaber in the opening sequence. In LSWIII you can rest well knowing that you can re-live the best door-opening in cinematic history fifty-something times over. Be prepared to cut through walls, doors and any other flat surface with the most elegant weapon known to man.
Applied Door Physics 101: Qui Gon Door
The Bad
Flying blind - Save for one exceptional, on rails boss fight, the flight sequences in LSWIII are painfully-boring and so painstakingly-directed. Almost every flights follows this or a similar sequence: destroy droid fighters, destroy bombers, destroy droid fighters, destroy capital ship. Anytime I found myself in a starship, I died a little inside.
Shoot THAT guy! - If given the choice, I'd actively avoid using anyone other than Jedi characters. This was on account of the woeful targeting mechanics for any character equipped with a blaster. Sometimes I'd be running towards a group of enemies, mashing the fire button only to have a flurry of lasers disobendiently drift to side of their intended targets. Much like animated source material, the clone troopers - or anyone equipped with a blaster, for that matter - in LSWIII can barely hit the broad side of a barn.
The Ugly
Use the Force (Again?) - Things have not changed much at all since the first installment of this successful series. If anything, be it through age or the acquisition of a bachelor's degree or two, it's all the more obvious now. The game presented no surprises or challenge whatsoever. I'm aware that this game is primarily targeted at children, but some levels are so simple that your average child could take offense. The Lego Star Wars franchise has officially made the Murtaugh list , as in "I'm getting to old for this shit."
Lego Star Wars, you just made the list!
No ne3d - The 3D effects in Lego Star Wars III are innocuous at best and didn't add much to my experience with the game on the whole. Don't get me wrong, the game looks good and as above, suffers from few noticeable visual hitches; but that isn't to say that 3D has been effectively implemented in this title.
The Verdict 5.0/10 I've been playing Lego Star Wars III: The Clone Wars - or something remarkably-similar to it - for the last five or six years now. Sure, sometimes there are different characters and locales, but it all plays the same. Whether it's the Caped Crusader, Sallah or Anakin Skywalker, the experience differs only slightly. If you've never played a game from the series before, this could be a revelation: a kids game that an adult can actually play, and not be ashamed of it afterwards. It's a solid package with few wrinkles, but its been recycled to the point of obsolescence. If you've got a young Star Wars fan on board: this package is a pretty safe bet. For anyone over ten years of age, however: Lego Star Wars III: The Clone Wars will fail to challenge or excite.
Supervising my dog's convalescence made for a pretty rough weekend, but when he did finally sleep, I managed to fit in quite a bit of game time. I could dedicate yet another post to inFamous, as I have nearly completed an evil playthrough on Hard difficulty, but it's time my writing escaped from the sandbox. In between bouts of my powerfully-frustrating endeavour to experience Cole McGrath's adventure in its entirety, I fit in some portable retro goodness and multiple trials of two somewhat-disappointing demos. It's not like I expected anything much from Sonic Generations but El Shaddai: Ascension of the Metatron is one of those games that the (gaming) media will be talking about for years to come. Expect to hear the words "cult hit," "sleeper hit," and "under-rated," thrown around with gay abandon when this Old Testament-inspired title is discussed in lists that typically appear on IGN and Gameinformer.
Sonic Generations (Played on Xbox 360)
Sega is parading the Sonic Generations demo as a limited-time only affair, giving players twenty days to soak up the trial for what will be an inescapably-mediocre final release. The game - from what I can gather - is supposed to be some sort of Sonic retrospective; which is odd, given that most of the games in the franchise's storied, twenty year history aren't worth playing. My thoughts on Sonic's post Mega Drive adventures aside, the demo treats players to the Green Hill, Zone 1; the first level of the first ever installment of Sonic the Hedgehog. Rather than simply regurgitating classic examples of level design and platforming action with pretty, high-definition graphics, the developers instead opted to spoil a sure thing by introducing a lackadaisical camera and momentum-killing physics. The latter, found in Sonic 4: Episode 1, is one of the contributing factors to Green Hill, Zone 1's length being extended to two and a half painstaking minutes as opposed to the original which can be bested in forty seconds. Jumps always seem to fall shy of their intended targets, movement through loops often stops abruptly (even though I'm still pressing forward on my controller) and that afforementioned camera fails to keep up with the action. Sure there is only one instance where the camera actually has to move to track Sonic's movement up a looping track that traces a mountain, but it lazily stutters behind him. The only positive things I have to say about it is that thankfully, the original music has been retained and the action is far easier to track than it has been since Sonic's games switched to a third-person perspective from his first adventure on the Dreamcast.
Our childhood favourite is in another castle
As much as I hate to say it: it may be time we put the hedgehog down for good. In all honesty, the blue blur hasn't been in a good game since the early nineties (mid ninenties if you want to push it). I used to think Sonic Adventure and its sequel were something of worth, but they have not aged well. Sonic Generations does not look like it is set to break the trend that's been running for the majority of Sega's mascot's lifespan.
The Verdict
Just over two minutes of mediocrity. Save some bandwidth and download the original instalment and its wonderful sequel instead.
El-Shaddai: Ascension of the Metatron (downloadable via use of a US Playstation Network account)
I know I'm being cynical, but be prepared to hear about El-Shaddai until the day you die. It'll be mentioned alongside Ico, Shadow of the Colossus, Psychonauts and many others that were darlings with the critics, but didn't necessarily enjoy commerical success. It'll be thrown into any "Are Games Art?" argument you'll encounter after its release. It will haunt videogame journalism until the end; and it won't deserve to. Well it won't based on what I've played so far, that's for sure.
It plays similar to games like Devil May Cry and Bayonetta with fixed camera angles and mainly-melee combat. The difference with El-Shaddai however, is the arsenal at the player's command; instead of an inventory of devastating weapons, you procure them from your enemies after "purifying" them. Again, as per DMC and Bayonetta, you can perform dazzling combos that can be launched into the air with the proper input. It gets old pretty fast - in El-Shaddai's case - on account of only being able to hold one weapon at a time. Further to that, I couldn't understand what the implications of the weapons' colour were. I found that after spamming attacks, my purified weapons turned brown; did that mean they were no longer effective? Truth be told, I like the unarmed attacks I could use before equipping anything; but I'm sure that those attacks wouldn't be effective against a great many foes.
Apart from the confusing combat, there's some uninspiring platforming set to some pretty impressive backgrounds. The jumping mechanics felt a bit stiff (once again, very much like DMC) but that wasn't really of much consequence given the simplicity of these sections. The reason that I'd possibly return to El-Shaddai is not the gameplay though, it's the visuals. They aren't particularly impressive from a technical perspective, but artistically, the game manages to tick a few boxes. Jumping across lashing waves didn't feel too fresh, but it looked freaking beautiful.
Imagine waves crashing against a mass of floating rock
Finally, the demo affords players glimpses of El-Shaddai's seemingly nonsensical, religiously-themed narrative. Lots of finger clicking, people in suits, a denim-clad hero and an old man in transforming armour isn't making for anything coherent as far as the demo is concerned. That being said, it's not really selling me on the final product either.
Are those True Religion jeans?
The Verdict
Looks interesting enough, but with uninspired action and a seemingly-muddled narrative, El-Shaddai may only be memorable because of its distinctive visuals.
What demos have you guys engaged with recently? Were they for games that you're looking forward to?
By now everyone has heard about Duke Nukem Forever – a game thought lost to the trials and tribulations of an industry gone mad, only to be revived, delayed and finally delivered after 12 years. Now it’s released and The Fan inside me is going nuts – an iconic childhood hero is returning to the lime light and life is exciting. Unfortunately The Man is keeping The Fan down, looking at the game like an adult, and, like a true 1950’s TV dad, is ready to shake his head in disapproval.
The game starts off with Duke having to dispose of a giant boss in a sports arena. Once destroyed, the camera pans out to reveal Duke playing his own game. As you head off to another TV interview, the same aliens from Duke Nukem 3D invade earth again and steal all the babes. Once your twin babes are taken, the kid gloves are off and Duke runs off to kick ass and chew bubble gum.
The Good
Duke Nukem Forever is actually quite funny. Sure you’ll laugh at bits that aren’t meant to be funny but for the most part, you’ll laugh for all the right reasons. Whether it be at Duke’s quips or the games’ nuances (such as his various awards, the name of the casino he calls home, signage etc) there are many entertaining moments.
Secondly, the game is so absurd that its’ unbelievable premise actually becomes sound. Being missing in action for a decade means that it hasn’t evolved like modern day first person shooters so it still plays like an early 90’s adventure platformer turned 3D shooter. It does things differently – who needs armour when you can drink beer to become less vulnerable to attacks? Rather than get a health boost, take steroids and become stronger than ever. Although a long way from the cola he drank in the first game, this different view on power ups and bonuses is refreshing.
Finally I also liked how the control setup options were labelled. After using the default for a while I got frustrated and needed to change it. Strangely enough, the setting named Duty Calls was quite comfortable and familiar. Gee, I wonder why.
Fan status: laughing out loud at jokes and loving the little things that make Duke, Duke. Childhood is returning and life is good.
Man status: the good is good and The Man is happy.
The Bad
This game is frustrating in two ways. Firstly, t he scripting and NPC voice acting isn’t all that great. Why do I care about the NPC acting? Because they are meant to tell me where to go or what to do! The sound is so low on these characters and I often found myself spending much more time on a puzzle or area than I should have. Sure I heard when the randy Mum suggestively said she would go down with me any time (selective hearing perhaps?), but the main reason I hit the guy behind the talk show was because my hands came up. The only time I can recall hearing any coherent conversation from the NPCs was when there was no action or music.
Secondly, the level direction is quite inconsistent. By this I mean some levels are simple to navigate with clear direction, while others are quite difficult to find your way around. A perfect example is an early level where Duke is running through his mansion, is shrunk down and drives around in a remote control car. Not only was this painfully long, I got lost way too often. Everything looks the same and is very confusing – at one stage I thought I was going backwards but as it turns out, I was going the right way.
In contrast, when running around the Las Vegas streets, some areas were quite easy to navigate. So easy in fact that I found a battery for a crane that I didn’t even know I had to get. I found it after following four arrows telling me to climb the crane. Why couldn’t the car level have this much signage?
Fan status: still happy with the game but the excitement is waning. Duke is still throwing out the odd funny line to keep me happy.
Man status: solitary disapproving head shakes are accompanied with tsk’s. The Man is not happy.
The Ugly
For a company that had 12 years to create a game, it sure seems rushed. I realise this comment is unfair (and written with reckless abandon around the Internet) but Duke 3D was a great game because it was something new that matched the graphic standard of other FPS’s of the time. Yes, the Pig Cops and mammoth bosses look great from a distance but up close they aren’t as refined as they could be. The animation, particularly that of his twin babes and military sidekicks, is average at best and caused me to cringe at many stages through my session.
Finally, the load times on the 360 are shocking. I timed anywhere between 30 and 40 seconds each time I died. Because I died a lot, I worked out that during my six hour stint, I could have played an extra 20 minutes or so if the load was reduced to 5-8 seconds. NB The worst part of that sentence was admitting how much I died. As I re-read that statement, I’m shaking my head in disappointment.
Fan status: questioning how much of a fan I really am. Thankfully I’m still entertained by new interactions but I’m so glad I didn’t buy it new (or as a special edition).
Man status: the tsking has stopped but only to be replaced with unhappy grunts and oh’s. Thanks a lot load times and level design.
The Verdict
5.0 (even though it’s first thoughts, I felt like rating it). Ironically, Duke Nukem Forever can be reduced down to DNF - I did not finish the game and won’t likely see the conclusion any time soon. Despite only playing the first two chapters, I get the drift of DNF and see little value in it when priced at full retail. The game’s cheap animation and quite average FPS engine is no match for current shooters of today which is its main downfall. In addition, some levels are long and tedious which is why as The Man, I’m disappointed. As The Fan, I’m happy to see Duke return to something of substance (Manhattan Project doesn’t count as a game in my opinion) and enjoy a cheap laugh or two while throwing poo and slapping boobs on a wall. Had it not been for the fan element, DNF would’ve received a much lower score. Larger than life characters are rare in today’s world of realistic gaming and few can pull it off like Duke.
