Saturday, January 29

Weekend Update: Gimme' Shelter (from the Bulletstorm)

Bulletstorm asks players to kill a "metric-fuck-ton," of enemies with skill. There doesn't seem to be a compelling motive for this undertaking; if there is, it's not apparent in the demo recently published on Xbox Live and the Playstation Network. Apart from the obvious objective of survival, the only other reason you're given to play is to out-score your friends; there's no greater good that you're fighting for, and no civilians to save. People Can Fly have tasked gamers to kill throngs of people and monsters in elaborate fashions because it is amusing to behold, and humans are by nature, comtpetitive. The me of 5 years ago wouldn't have had much of a problem with this; however these days, the older, infinitely-more principled (read: boring) me needs some greater purpose to take a life. Bulletstorm may be a reasonably good-looking game, with some interesting weapons and score mechanics, but ultimately (at least in its demo form) it seems pointless.

Don't get me wrong: I chuckled the first time I scored a "Gag Reflex," and a "Voodoo Doll." I laughed out loud (lol'd if you will) when I performed the "Mercy," skillshot. The mirth began to fade after I played the game as intended; witnessing these gory, sometimes humorous death animations several hundred times over on repeated playthoughs, trying to best my previous scores. I'm sure the full retail version will have some form of narrative, and enough change-ups in pacing to engage me for a few hours (maybe even a single plathrough); but at the moment I can't help but feel it will be Vanquish all over again. A squad of potty-mouthed, murderous rogues exhausting me with their radbaditude.

In other demo-related news, the multiplayer demo (or closed beta as its advertised on the XBLM) for Crysis 2 went live on Wednesday, and I must say that I am disappointed with what I have seen and played. For all of Crytek's huffing and puffing, the game does not appear to be any more attractive than most recent FPS releases, and plays much like your average Call of Duty instalment. Granted you can cloak, and jump a fair bit higher thanks to the nanosuit; but in the end Crysis 2's multiplayer offering doesn't appear to be the breath of fresh air I hoped it would be (to qualify once again, at least in demo form). The game also features a now, clichéd rank and unlock system. I'm sure once again, that the full version will feature some interesting upgrades to your nanosuit which should hopefully serve to differentiate it from the competition. There is of course, a single player campaign to consider as well, which is not featured in the demo: so I'm not quite ready to remove Crysis 2 from the list of potential purchases in 2011. With that being said however, I wrote to a friend recently:

"I was hoping to spend less on games this year, but if there is any hype behind it, odds are that you'll find it at my house. Shooter or otherwise."

I know this may read like a future FPS troll-fest, but I was hoping that at the very least, Bulletstorm would not be a blood-soaked, one-hundred-dollar ticket to the Gears of War 3 beta. I guess that "Kill with Skill," is the first tagline in recent memory to hold a candle to that of Bizarre Creations’ 2008 release, The Club. “The Club rewards stylish kills,” after all.

What’s your favourite regrettable quote or tagline from a videogame? What have you guys been playing recently?


  1. Yeah, I don't really have too much interest in either. I did get a kick out of Painkiller, back in the day, speaking of Bulletstorm.

    Honestly, though, I think The Club did a better job. It was clean and, for my money, kinda subtle.

    I've been playing *gulp* Ascendancy on the iPhone. Yep, the old 4X Space Empire builder from 1996 has been ported, and while the UI is something out of "My First Iphone App", it works and finally the goddamn machine has a massive strategy game that isn't another bloody tower defense clone.

  2. I was also a fan of Painkiller. I will pick up Bulletstorm as I think it will be a pleasant change of pace and demeanour from Killzone 3.

    I loved The Club, especially the multiplayer when I could find a match. Single player score attack was still plenty of fun though.

    There aren't many games of substance on the old WP7 OS just yet. No good strategy games available, that's for damn sure!

    What are your thoughts on the NGP, Taz?

  3. A tasty, tasty piece of tech, but that's always Sony for you. Outside of that, who knows. Dunno if I'll be there Day One like I was for the PSP, but it's kinda tempting.

    To be honest, though, I really want new IPs on the damn thing. I don't want a bunch of ports.

  4. Unsurprisingly, I'll be a first-adopter. Don't know if I'll bother with the 3DS after seeing the NGP.

    PS2 ports (and piracy, mainly piracy) killed the PSP. I agree, it would be great to see some new IPs, if not new games using existing IPs on the NGP.

  5. I played Bulletstorm through about 5 or 6 times. Best score was about 6 mins. I got bored after that.

    I have never bought a portable system, but the NGP looks so damn sexy, I may actually buy it. It will be kinda hard not to.